It's a Love Story {Part 2}

Here's Part 1 if you missed it. 

Recap- I'm beginning to admit I like Josh but I have Boyfriend... and am very conflicted.

Ok, so something I thought of later yesterday was that earlier in this story, before anything much with Josh had happened Boyfriend and I had a discussion.  He was dropping me off at the end of a night and he brought up the subject of summer.  The end of the semester was coming soon and he knew I was going home to Florida for the summer and he was going to be in Utah or his home {California}.  So that was 3 months of not being together and we'd only been dating about 2 months.  He told me he thought we should break up just for over the summer and get back together when I came back to Utah.  I was surprised and caught off guard... he wanted to break up???  I thought things were going really well.  I was upset and he said that was just what he thought we should do.  But he said I could decide.  If I wanted us to stay together the whole time, we would.  If I decided we should break up for summer, we would do that.  I hadn't thought about this at all yet, so I told him I'd think about it and let him know.  I went home and prayed about it.  I didn't want to break up, but after praying I felt really good about breaking up for the summer.  I felt that if it was meant to be and work out, we'd get back together and all would be happy and good.  If it wasn't supposed to work out, then we'd stay broken up.  I was really glad I'd prayed about it because afterwards I felt very peaceful about the decision to break up for summer.  I knew it was an answer from God because before all I'd felt was conflicted and sad. 

{At the movie theater}

Ok!  Back to where we were.  I'd been spending more time around Josh and having a lot of fun with him.  Like I mentioned, the semester was winding down.  Finals were coming and so lots of studying needed to be done.  One night in particular I needed to study for this one final coming up and Josh said he needed to study too.  So we decided to study together.  Yay!  I went over to his apartment and we sat at opposite ends of the couch {I still have Boyfriend remember} with all our books and papers between us.  We studied, chatted a little, and studied more.  He helped quiz me at one point on my material.  My phone rang during this and it was Boyfriend.  Big guilt trip...  I got up and went to talk to him outside of Josh's apartment.  He wanted to see me and hang out.  I told him I couldn't.  That I was studying and really needed to for this final.  He didn't like that so he tried to get me to take a break.  I said I couldn't and I was sorry.  {I really did have to study people, that's the truth!}  I even told him was over at 26 {the guys apartment, he knew who they were} studying.  Anyways, so we hung up and I went back inside to continue studying.  A little while later guess who comes walking by the window peeking inside?  Boyfriend!!!  Agggh!  I jumped up {very guiltily-like, even though we were still on opposite sides of the couch} and ran outside.  I asked him what he was doing here.  He wanted to see me and see if I would stop studying and come do something with him.  I again told him I couldn't, hugged, kissed, and then he left.  I remember feeling very weird about all of this.  Studying with a guy I was starting to like but trying not to like and kissing my boyfriend right outside his apartment.  Then leaving Boyfriend to go back inside with Josh.  It was an awkward night.  I felt weird going back inside, I didn't know what to say to Josh.  I'd hoped he didn't see us kiss.  I don't remember anything else specific about that night, we studied more and I eventually went back to my apartment. 

At some point, I don't remember how, but Josh offered to take me to the airport after I was done with finals.  {He actually took me to the airport last semester-the end of Fall 2006- in December as well, he was my hometeacher remember.}  My flight was super early in the morning but he insisted he wanted to so we decided to make an evening out of it.  We'd just hang out all night, not go to bed, and then leave for the airport {I think it was around 3am}.  I was really excited to spend all that time together.  

{On the pier at the beach in California}

My last day in Utah {well, for 3 months} eventually came.  I was going to hang out with Boyfriend later and then that'd be it.  We'd say goodbye and be broken up for the summer.  I was cleaning up my apartment when I heard some guys voices come in.  I was really hopeful that one of them was Josh and it was!  {I think we had just texted and I'd told him I was cleaning}  Unfortunately, just as Josh came over Boyfriend was right behind him.  Yes, at this point I know I really liked Josh.   But what's the point in breaking up with Boyfriend if we're already about to anyways.  So I leave with Boyfriend sadly wishing Josh had come over sooner.  Boyfriend and I walk around downtown and he wants to buy me some shirts.  So we shop around and  pick them out then we walk back to my apartment.  I felt bad him buying things for me, but he really wanted to!  And he knew we were breaking up too.  So I just let him. When he dropped me off we hugged and said bye, but it was like a normal bye, not a goodbye for months.  It was almost like we we're just going to see each other tomorrow.  I wasn't going to kiss him, but if he kissed me I'd have to kiss him too.  Fortunately, he didn't even try to kiss me.  Which was weird, but I was grateful!  We said bye and that was it.  We were broken up.  {We never said anything out loud about it, I guess we'd already gotten that out of the way.}  Now I couldn't wait to hang out with Josh all night!

When I walked into my apartment I saw that Josh and some other people were playing ping pong down on the ground level.  {My apartment was on the 3rd floor.}  Fortunately, Joey {Josh's roommate} was there was about to leave.  Perfect!  I told him to wait for me, I was going to go down with him.  That way I didn't have to feel awkward going down by myself.  There were a bunch of people playing ping pong, taking turns and such.  I played for a bit.  When I was sitting there it was kinda chilly with the wind blowing.  Josh asked if I needed a coat.  I said I was ok, don't worry about it.  He didn't listen.  He ran upstairs to his apartment and grabbed a coat for me.  Awww, how sweet!  I put it on and found his mp3 player in the pocket.  I began listening to his music.  Eventually everyone who was playing left and it was just us 2.  We made up this game with the ping pong ball where we were kicking it around like a soccer ball trying to get it into the golf ball holes.  {Yeah, our apartment complex had a little putting green}  It was fun and lot of flirty touching was going on.  He'd grab me and pick me up or tickle me if I was about to score and try to stop me and vice versa.  It was fun!  We finished {I won by the way} and I don't remember what happened for the next few hours.  

 {at a football game}

We hung out til midnight at one of our apartments.  Then, because of BYU curfew, we left at midnight and went to his married brother's apartment.  {For those of you who know them, it was Adam and Jennilyn's apartment, but I'd never met them before. They were already in bed, so I still didn't meet them.}  We brought a game- Disney Princess Memory and a movie- I don't remember what it was.  We played Disney Princess Memory, which I rock at that game.  I can beat anyone, anytime!  {People, mostly guys who didn't think a girl could beat them, would challenge me when they heard how good I was and I'd kick their butts}  Josh was the only one who'd come even close to beating me in this game.  Anyways, so we played.  He said he let me win.  I don't believe that.  And then we watched the movie.  It wasn't that good, in my opinion.  But I liked sitting right next to Josh on the couch under the blanket.  It was nice.  I eventually rested my head on his shoulder, he put his arm around me, and we stayed like that until we had to drive to the airport at 3am.

We talked on the drive and then said goodbye and hugged at the airport.  I don't remember much, but I remember I was sad I wouldn't get to see him for awhile.     

To be continued...